What it's like to Suffer from Endometriosis

Today I welcome back my gorgeous sister, Tegan, to talk to us about Endometriosis to help us understand why some people find it difficult to have children. May I say here that boys you might want to stop reading unless you want to be completely grossed out! Haha don't say that I didn't warn you!

Tegan's bump!

Take it away Tegan.

I was roughly 14 when I was delighted with the site of my first ever menstrual cycle. WELL I won't go into the glory detail but here's a rough idea of what I went through...

From day dot I experienced pain like you would not believe. My periods where very and I mean VERY heavy, I passed clots the size of 50 cent pieces, I experienced iron in-deficiency due to loosing so much blood, I would faint, get hot and cold flushes, break out in random sweats etc (this was soon controlled with iron tablets) and my periods would sometimes last up to 2 weeks at a time.

I could not take the pill to try and control my periods because I experienced migraines. I would also have a blurry vision and a tingling sensation down my arm. The doctor told me that there was an ingredient in the pill that could trigger a stroke therefore she referred me to a mini pill which was safe. I tried 2 different mini pills which both didn't seem to have any effect on me what so ever. I was then encouraged by my gynecologist to try the implemon, which i did.

The implemon is inserted into your inner arm and is meant to last 3 years. I had mine in for 2 and a half years before I started to experience old symptoms again so I had it  removed.

When I was 16 I had my first operation; a Laparoscopy. This explained all my symptoms; i was diagnosed with Endometriosis http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Endometriosis My uterus was covered in it. My gynecologist in Port Lincoln whom completed the surgery referred my to a gynecologist in Adelaide whom was more experienced with the removal of Endometriosis as it was all around my main organs. I also had adhesions http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adhesion_(medicine) in my tummy from when I had my appendix removed when I was 14 years of age. In other words; my uterus was a mess.

  I then went through with my second operation a Hysteroscopy.http://www.thewomens.org.au/Hysteroscopy This allowed the gynecologist to have a good go at cleaning up my uterus and burning away the adhesions caused from having my appendix removed.  He found that my ovaries had attached themselves to the back of my uterus walls. My ovaries were released in this operation. ALSO the gynecologist found 2 chocolate cysts, 1 on each of my ovaries which were also removed in this procedure.

After each operation I would have a check up with the gynecologist to find out all the details about what they found. I was 18 when I was told to have children now. If I left it too much longer, than my chances of falling pregnant would be incredibly slim.  WOW that was a lot to swallow but I didn't really think much of it as I wasn't even ready at the time anyway!

I was nearly 21 when my partner proposed and we started discussing plans for a wedding and then children. Wait.... CHILDREN!!!! That is when my concerns kicked in and I asked my gynecologist if there were any tests I could complete to find out my chances of falling pregnant. At the age of 21 a blood test confirmed that I had 4% chance of concieving. At this stage we were handed a whole heap of brochures about IVF and were told that there were other things available if we couldn't conceive naturally. WELL... with my wedding coming up in just over 12 months my partner and I made the choice to wait until our wedding to start trying.

3 months before our wedding my partner and I were laying in bed when he brought up the conversation that he was ready to start trying. I remember saying 'you are just being lazy and don't want to put protection on!!' He then reassured me that no he truly was ready! I thought to myself 'OMG are we really having this conversation?!' After my partner saying 'the chances of it happening between now and the wedding....' I thought about it and said as I was giggling 'knowing the wedding IS only 3 months away we no doubt will conceive just because we have waited 12 months now....' Therefore we booked in to the doctors together to discuss what we needed to do in preparation for conceiving. 

I had many blood tests carried out to check for many different things and my partner completed a sperm count. My results came back positive and I was ovulating beautifully so my dr said and my partners sperm count came back with a high percentage also. I was waiting for my next period to carry out yet again another test to make sure I was releasing the correct amount of eggs in a cycle. I keep records of all my periods in my calendar on my phone therefore I was able to give my dr dates to work out when I was roughly ovulating. This allowed her to give us a 'map' of when to 'go your hardest' were our dr's terms.

6 weeks into 'going our hardest' I got this feeling that I just needed to complete a pregnancy test. My boobs were sore and I felt guilty one night when drinking alcohol with a friend. I just felt different.

My partner was away at work as he works 7 days on and 7 days off. I built up the nerve to take a test when my partner just happen to call me as I was heading to the toilet. I mentioned to him what I was doing. After I peed on the stick we waited in silence as the screen started to display the chemical reaction. My partner was saying 'well what does it say?!' After waiting the few minutes I compared my results to the instructions. 

I remember saying 'i think it is positive.' My partner demanded that I send him a picture of the instructions against my test so that he could compare it. I waited in silence as he received the picture message and then as he cleared his throat he says 'congratulations WE'RE HAVING A BABY!!!' I cried as he shouted with joy!! (so really it took us 3 weeks).

The next morning I woke up and raced into town and bought another test. I went up to a friends house where I completed it. 2 lines appeared... another positive test!! I also just happen to have a dr's appointment before I had to be at work to complete a pap smear but on arrival I mentioned to the nurse about the tests and asked if I just went through with a blood test. She agreed and later on that afternoon I was phoned up from the surgery with a lovely 'congratulations, the test came back positive, you are roughly 5 weeks pregnant!' WHOOOOOOOOO i couldn't not stop crying with joy!!!

I just wanted to ring up my gynecologist and say 'HA, 4% chance my bottom!!!!' (or really is it a miracle??) Who knows but WHO CARES - I'M PREGNANT!!!!'

  I am now 24 weeks and loving every moment of being pregnant, the sickness and all!

Therefore if there is anyone reading this that can relate to any of the above or has been tested and told that your chances are low, do NOT believe what you hear as in my circumstances, you just never know!! Stay positive and keep on 'going your hardest' so my dr told my partner and I!!

Is there anyone else out there with an amazing story like mine? I would love to hear it!!


All the best & goodluck!! :)

Don't Tell The Guests

There is nothing more exciting then planning your very own wedding day.

There's definitely a lot to think about - and if you forget, there's always people to remind you (haha).

Wedding dresses, location, date, celebrants, photographers, decorations, bridal party, flowers, hair and make up, transport, videographers, shoes, guest lists, special roles, accommodation, garters, alcohol, catering, wedding cakes, invites...the list goes on!

For some, it can be a very overwhelming experience while for others, they have had the day planned out right down to the way the napkins are folded for years.

I find that it's kind of a touchy subject, the whole wedding thing. Some people are more then happy to give their opinion on where you should shop to buy your dress, who you should and shouldn't have on the guest list, and omg, don't even think about hiring such and such to do your decorations, you MUST have such and such.

I guess sometimes we're left either biting our tongue or wondering: how much advice is too much advice? Is it okay to ask the bride about how the wedding preparations are going? Should I suggest this really great celebrant or should I just back away? Should I offer to help or should I let the bride and groom do their thing? How much should you divulge about the wedding day?

Well for me, I'm an open book, and while I am going to keep some things secret, I thought that I'd create a weekly 'Don't Tell the Guests' blog post, to track the decisions made and progress of our wedding.

And then...once the wedding is all done and dusted, I can post photos of how it all came together and brag about how amazing the day was!

Here's so pictures that I've been chuckling over:



How's this for a dress? Via



Ohhh dear - please don't let this happen to us! Via

Coming from the country, this is probably what our wedding car is going to end up looking like! Via

I will definitely be needing something like this to stop me from spilling food on my dress haha Via

These bridesmaid dresses are just so sexy Via

Do you have any funny photo memories from a wedding?

Look after yourself and those around you,

Kirsty xxx



Keeping Anxiety At Bay

I have suffered from anxiety - and not just those nervous little butterflies that you get before public speaking - I'm talking gigantic moths that flit around in your stomach - can't turn your brain off - eyes the size of saucepans at 3am in the morning  - heart racing - palm sweating anxiety.

 

Here's some tips for helping to keep anxiety at bay.

1. LAUGH OFTEN - nothing feels better than the full belly, do a little bit of pee in your pants, tears rolling down your face laugh. Don't be afraid to laugh at yourself too - nothing is ever THAT BAD!

Pretty sure I'm holding my belly here to hold the wee in!

2. CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE - Sounds a little harsh, and trust me, when my partner first said it to me I almost lost my shit, but it works. Whenever I'm ranting, grumpy, whinging, or feeling a bit crappy about something, I tell myself to change my attitude: try it - it works.

3.  SAY NO! Why is it that as kids we say no all of the time but as adults, we often experience verbal diarrhea and blurt out yes! A simple philosophy that I now follow is "if it's not a HELL YES then it's a HELL NO".  This book sums it up!

Via

4. WHY SO SERIOUS? Don't take life too seriously. I used to be the BIGGEST stress head/perfectionist/control freak out there and it was EXHAUSTING! I'm definitely learning to let go - DELEGATE, DELEGATE, DELEGATE and to use my new saved energy to just have fun, and go with it! I mean really - what's the WORST that can happen?

Then you get more photos like this!

And crazy fun times like this!

5. PUT YOU IN YOUR DIARY!  And don't bail on yourself - I'm sure you hate people bailing on you!

6. FOCUS ON YOUR BREATHING. What on earth am I talking about - don't we just breath subconsciously? Well yes, you'd be dead if you didn't - but I'm talking about consciously breathing. Taking a HUGE deep breath in and then exhaling quickly! It feels SO much better!

I hope these help you as much as they help me!

Look after yourself and those around you,

Kirsty xxx

Helping Those Who Are Suicidal.

Via

 Panic!

Someone has just told you that they are experiencing suicidal thoughts (or, you believe that someone is suffering from suicidal thoughts).

While your eyes well with tears and a lump of fear forms in your throat, your mind is racing thinking what on earth am I meant to say and do to help this person (while secretly wanting to wrap them up in cotton ball and not let them out of your sight)?

Are they being serious? Are they just "attention seeking"? Do they realise that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary illness? Why are they being so selfish? Don't they love me? Can't they see who they'll leave behind? Surely it can't be that bad...

Via

These aren't easy questions to answer, or even understand, but I will try to give some advice on what to say and do and an insight into how the person may be feeling, based on my experience with depression.

1. Are they being serious/ are they just attention seeking?

Treat any mention of suicide as serious; you never know who, if anyone else, they have told, how long they have been feeling this way and whether these are passing thoughts or full on manifestations with planned actions. I would try and dig a little deeper (and I know this can be very confronting).

 You could try questions like:

How long have you been feeling this way?

Have you made any plans to commit suicide?

Do you think about it all of the time?

It will help the person to verbalise their thoughts. Then, when you refer them on to a professional, you can pass on this information to them.

2. Do they realise that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary illness?

 No, they don't. This may be difficult to understand if you have never suffered from depression yourself.

Surely suicide = death?

The sufferer feels as though their body has been "taken over" by an "evil twin" who has inhabited their mind, controls their thoughts and makes them virtually unrecognisable to themselves. The act of suicide, in the mind of the sufferer, is therefore a last desperate attempt to rid themselves of this "evil twin"; without realising that in doing this, they will actually be taking their own life.

Suicidal people don't want to die, they just don't want to continue feeling the immense pain that they are experiencing.

I know this sounds harsh, but you almost have to make the person visualise what suicide means: dying, being placed in a coffin and being buried, friends and family attending a funeral, their photo on top of the coffin, and no longer living life.

That way the person can try to understand the full ramifications of suicide and will hopefully start to understand that it is not a helpful solution. Once they have accepted this, then it will help them to look for other, more helpful solutions.

There is no life after suicide for the sufferer.

3. Why are they being so selfish/why don't they love me/don't they know how it'll impact those around them?

A person who is contemplating suicide is clearly not thinking rationally. Even healthy thinking people sometimes struggle to think of the impacts of their actions on those around them, so could you imagine what it's like to be in so much pain and distress, that you can't escape, control or challenge your own thoughts? In fact, the person may be suffering such a warped way of thinking that they might feel as though suicide is a way to remove their problem, so that others can move on with their lives and not "worry about them anymore."

Try to be patient with the person, and realise that it is their illness, not them, who is controlling these thoughts. 

 It is in no way a reflection of how they feel about those around them. The person certainly doesn't love you any less because of these thoughts, nor would they ever intend to inflict pain on anyone around them; they themselves know how horrible pain can be.

Listen carefully to what they have to say, ask them the difficult, shocking questions, let them know that you don't think any differently of them, let them know that you want to help them, and provide them information for who to contact for help.

You may need to dial the suicide helpline number for them.

 You may need to book them in and accompany them to an appointment. 

You may have to accept that they might need medication and hospitalisation.

Remember that you are not alone, there are professionals out there who can answer your questions and who can talk to the sufferer.

Look after yourself and those are you, 

Kirsty xxxx

Via

Via

An Empty Easel

This year I was invited to speak at Mindshare's poetry competition launch during mental health week. Here I met Bob, a very talented guy who writes poetry. I assure you that this poem will move you, as it gives you an insight into how someone who is in the early days of Alzheimer's, may feel.

An Empty Easel

Alzheimer’s paints anesthetised visions

Of yesterday’s reminiscences.

Life’s colours flow brightly,

Diminishing into a swirl

Of blurred mind-images.

My remaining memories scare me,

I know they are soon to leave

Just an empty easel

Void of life’s paintings.

Just remember that I loved you dearly

When my canvas is bare.

Written beautifully by Bob Jarrad.

Accepting a Compliment

Via

Compliment: an expression of praise, commendation, or admiration: A sincere compliment boosts one's morale (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/compliment?s=t) .

Learning to accept a compliment is one of the best things that you can do to improve your self confidence.

You work hard – yes?

You respect other people – yes?

You try to be the best possible person that you can be – yes?

Then a compliment is just someone acknowledging these qualities within you and verbalising them to you.

It’s okay to have a giddy smile on your face when someone showers you with words of praise.

It’s okay to say nothing in return but thank you and secretly pat yourself on your back and to do a silly dance inside.

You must learn not to be so harsh on yourself – treat yourself how you would like others to treat you.

I must admit that I used to have little to no self confidence in myself. I would bite my tongue when I really wanted to blurt my opinion out, when someone would give me a compliment I’d brush it off, or worse, think that they were saying it because I WASN’T capable.

But something changed after I was sick last year – I realised that in order to be happy and confident I had to monitor “my self talk” (you know that little voice inside of your head), which included accepting compliments.

Once I did this – my confidence grew, and now I have done things, met people, and experienced a new level of happiness that I’ve never felt before.

You deserve to be complimented- you deserve to be patted on the back – you deserve to be kind to yourself.

So next time someone gives you a compliment and you don’t know what to say and do, simply pause, smile, say thank you, and give yourself permission to bask in the glory – I promise you’ll have a little spring in your step, and you’ll soon watch your confidence grow.

Look after yourself and those around you,

Kirsty xxx