Unspoken Conversations are the topics that are often swept under the carpet, whispered amongst the closest of friends and bitched about by many. I want to create awareness about difficult things that people face in life; grief, mental health, money, illnesses, family troubles, relationship difficulties and putting yourself first. I want to tell the truth about things that really matter.

Wednesday, 28 November 2012

Enjoying the Simple Things...

Sometimes we get so caught up in the big complicated world of being grown ups that we forget to take the time to enjoy the little things.

Next time you're madly rushing to work with your head buried deep inside of your phone checking emails, catching up on the Facebook goss or checking your to do list, I dare you to put your phone away and:

Glance up at the sky and appreciate how blue it is.
Owwww and arrrr at the new blossoms symbolising new life and the change of season.
Tune your ears into the musical melody of the birds chirping.
Feel the warmth of the suns rays warming up your skin like an electric blanket.

You'll feel much better for it and will start your day in a much better frame of mind instead of stressing, worrying and fretting about the 50 million things you have to squeeze into you day, I promise.

The view along the Torrens River, Adelaide, South Australia.

Taking time to indulge in a book that takes you a million miles away from your life!

Enjoying the feel of the sun shining on your skin.

Truly appreciating the beauty in things around you. The University of Adelaide campus.

Kicking off your heels on your lunch break!

Kicking back and taking everything in.

Enjoy the little things,

Kirsty xxxx

Monday, 26 November 2012

Should we send the boat people back?

Let’s get political, buttttt before we go any further, I want to stress that I, in no way, think that I am an expert in this area. I am just trying to raise the issue and try and explain some of the terms that are thrown around in the media.

Boat people, refugees***, queue jumpers,  asylum seekers***, foreigners, detention camps, processing centres, Christmas Island, Nauru – we’ve all heard of these terms splashed across the front pages of the news, but what do they mean? How do they affect us? Why does the very mention of any of these words “divide a nation?”

*** what is the difference between refugees and asylum seekers? Refugees have been able to prove that they are in fear of their life and are fleeing a war torn country to government officials and asylum seekers are in the process of being assessed as refugees.

Here’s 9 points for you to consider that you may not know, or have even thought of (as many of these are not often advertised via mainstream media), as written by Jess Frost, a friend who I have met in this world of blogging. She is also not an expert but has spoken to many refugees that have been through Australia's detention system and has read much on this issue over the past several years.  There are a few myths you've probably heard she'd love to clear up for you - 


1.      Seeking Asylum is not illegal, whether by boat or plane. You probably didn't know but more Asylum Seekers arrive in Australia each year by plane than those that arrive by boat.

Reported in 2009, the number of plane arrivals was 30 times that of boat arrivals. and plane arrivals are far less likely to be genuine refugees. Plane arrivals are able to live in the community while their claims are processed where as boat arrivals are locked in detention centres. 

Asylum seekers that arrive by boat are often called queue jumpers because when they are accepted as refugees in Australia, the government counts them in their quota of refugees according the humanitarian intake that is set. By this logic, 'plane people'like boat people would be 'queue jumping as well. Have you ever heard about that in the news because I know I only ever hear about the boats? The reason that this myth has been perpetuated is because the government has two quotas each year for refugees - one for onshore arrivals (planes and boats) and humanitarian intake (straight from camps - like in Malaysia/Indonesia/Africa) and for no rational reason these numbers are linked, so plane and boat arrivals mean less people directly from camps. So this ridiculous queue forms, when in actual fact people aren't all sitting in camps with a numbered ticket like we get at the deli... there isn't a queue. And as long as there conflicts in the world or places like Indonesia and Malaysia don't treat refugees humanely, people will flee for their lives. These quotas should be de-linked and then everyone can forget about the idea of a queue.


2. People come here by boat because they are desperate. How is that hard to imagine?! Some times I think the anti-asylum seeker advocates should put themselves in someone elses shoes -
http://youtu.be/_OUpsWCvE38 just something to think about.

3.The problem is that until there is world peace there will always be people seeking asylum while war ravages countries or dictators abuse civilians.  If our home was no longer safe we would do anything we could to make our loved ones safe again, even if that might be fleeing to another country.

4. Australia signed the UN convention of refugees and so has an obligation to provide safety for these people, not shipping them off to countries where they will be in more danger or in overcrowded camps or essentially prisons, waiting for years and years with no idea of their future.


5.Yes, sometimes people who aren't legitimate refugees try and seek asylum and that is the point of processing. This doesn't mean that these people (mums, dads, kids - families) need to be locked up like criminals for years on end. Children seeking asylum aren't criminals, yet many continue to languish in detention centres.


6. Concerned about our country getting over-run with refugees? 
In 2010, the number of refugees that arrived in Australia would only fill 6.8% of the seats in the MCG, I think we need to be more concerned with Brits who overstay their visas.


7. Australia's politicians have used tragedy and real people who have had their lives torn apart as political footballs to gain favour and win our votes for years and years. Now people see these myths as truth, and it's just not.

8. If our Politicians really cared about fulfilling our international obligations and giving everyone ' a good ole' Aussie fair go' (not just one 'type of people' then:
 * the humanitarian intakes would be increased and de-linked between arrivals from camps and onshore (boat and plane arrivals)
* investment would be made in a regional solution - the countries where asylum seekers first reach (like Malaysia & Indonesia) which don't currently recognise refugees, haven't signed on to the UN convention for refugees and/or where their lives continue to be at risk and are in no way safe. 
* do away with long term detention centres and move to community processing. Once initial security checks have occurred there is no reason why these people can't be allowed into the community and able to start to rebuild their lives after already losing so much - families, livelihoods, their homes.


9. People seeking asylum in Australia isn't new, those leaving war torn countries have rebuilt their lives here for years. Yet now there is a 'big refugee issue'. It's only an issue because both sides of government have failed to act in a humane way and looked for a long term solution within our region. 

In my opinion, we should all be welcoming to people who are seeking safety and protection in our country, after fleeing for their life. So often when I hear the news, 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you' rings in my mind. I wonder what all of those who are so anti- refugees would like done to them?

Just remember that we too, were boat people once upon a time Via

It will definitely be interesting to see how the government addresses the “boat people” problem that Australia faces in the future. Will the government start to channel money into prevention rather than cure methods, by increasing foreign aid to help countries to maintain peace and provide security for their people? This would help to reduce the number of people fleeing their country in the first place, instead of “dealing with them when they rock up on our doorstep”.

How would you like to be treated if you had to flee Australia in fear of your life? 

What are your thoughts?

Look after yourself and those around you,



If you would like to learn more, here are a couple of useful links:
Rethink Refugees
Refugee Council of Australia

Thursday, 22 November 2012

I'm Going to Miss...

7 years. 

Adelaide has been the place that I have called home for the past 7 years, but the tiny town that I grew up in has always been known as "home home" to me - it's clearly the place where my heart belongs.

In January my partner and I are moving "home home". While I'm SUPER excited to be able to duck around to our parents houses for dinner,  spoil my new niece or nephew, the amazing beaches, relaxed atmosphere and fresh air and rainwater, I'm definitely going to miss some things about living in the crazy town!

 These include:

Soaking in the beauty of the River Torrens as I escape the office for some fresh air and Vitamin D.

The HUGE choice of food, particularly Zen Kitchen for Vietnamese, Gouger Street for the tapas, sangria and Chinese and Charminars for the Indian!

The Barossa Valley, Adelaide Hills and the Clare Valley for the mouth watering wine!

A hummer limo wine tour!
Mick and I are a wine tour to the Barossa Valley!
Yup, we don't muck around when it comes to wine!

My beloved Adelaide Lutheran Sporting Club and the punch, dancing and dress ups that come with it!

These burgers are the main reason that I play for the club - amazing! I'm going to miss the mouth watering goodness!
When the club does a dress up night - everyone gets into the swing of things!

Yes - one of our netty trips was to the Gold Coast Theme Parks!

Tight and Bright night!

All my time favourite netball team - the year that Ash and I coached together!

My work mates.

Living around the corner from these little cherubs.

My aunty and her 4 gorgeous kiddies!

Andddd of course, my friends...yup, I'm going to miss them like crazy. I know there's Skype, and it's only a half hour flight, but there's something about knowing that you can call them and they can pop around at any time that I'm going to miss. Man I love these kids like a fat kid loves chocolate! They never fail to make me laugh!

Samarz and I making the most of the photobooth at a wedding!
Ash, one of my best friends from high school.

Carla and I back in the uni days when we'd consume copious amounts of the cheapest wine going (like $4 a bottle!)

Checking out the Lobethal Lights is always a highlight on my calender - especially with these two girls - Sarah and Rhiannon.

Amanda, me and Amz on Australia Day - kicking back in a blow up pool!

Samarz and Ran - the troublesome threesome house mates who had a fire engine, police and ambulance rock up at 3am because of an overheated wheat bag!

Sar - such a gorgeous girl she is!

Brock and Amy - love these kids so much!

Look after yourself and those around you,

Kirsty xxxx

Is it a luxury?

I sure take my cap off to these wonderful ladies! Via

Being a parent sounds like it must be the toughest gig going around. I mean, 9-5 is tough enough, but being a mum or dad is around the clock, 24/7.

You can't just throw the towel in when you've had enough, duck out for some alone time on your lunch break, or have time to think, blink or scratch yourself.

But I'm also sure that being a parent would be the most rewarding, fun and challenging role that we have to look forward to.

The other day, while I was feeling frustrated and a little stressed about the bills that keep flooding in, I wondered how families make ends meet.

How do they do it? 

I found myself wondering whether it's now a luxury as such, to be a full time stay at home mum/dad?

Is it only those that are well off who can afford to have one income coming in? Or, are families living off of baked beans and laughing it off by singing the baked bean song, pay day to pay day?

You know:

"Beans, beans, the musical fruit
The more you eat the more you toot
The more you toot the better you feel
So eat your beans for every meal!"

Pretty sure I'm going to look like this! Via

Is being a stay at home parent a thing of the past? Are people being forced to return to work because of the cost of living? Is the lack of financial assistance with child care costs and minimum lengths of maternity leave making it harder for the average Jo blow?

I sure hope that one day we are in a financial position for me to be able to stay at home and raise the kiddies...and preferably not on baked beans!

Look after yourself and those around you,

Kirsty xxxx

Wednesday, 21 November 2012

Your Challenge For Today


I challenge you to tell someone why you love them.

"I love you because..."

Trust me, it'll put the biggest smile on their face and a spring in their step.

Words are very powerful.

Have a great day.

Look after yourself and those around you,

Kirsty xxxx

Tuesday, 20 November 2012

Depression: One Year On

I view the world through a different lens after suffering from depression last year.

I no longer walk to work with my head buried deep inside of my phone. Instead, I leave my phone in my handbag and I look for the beauty in that morning.


I notice the light pink and white cherry blossoms that have formed on branches that almost looked dead, and how, each day, they open wider and wider, exposing the pollen within. I notice the bees making the most of this fresh morning delight, as they bask in the glory of fresh golden liquid. I notice the warmer air on my skin and the feel of the sun warming my back and I notice the tiny flowers following their life cycle and turning into cherries.


I breathe and not just the rhythmyical falling and filling of your chest cavity breath, but the very conscious, must-enjoy-the-feel-of-this-beautiful-warm-air-entering-in-through-my-nose-and-filling-my-chest type breathing.

There's a big difference to the way it makes you feel - go on, try it; the art of the conscious breath.


I have mantras up my sleeve so that when I start to feel overwhelmed or out of control, or angry, I can whip them out and recognise my thoughts, so that I can challenge and change them.

These include:
Is it really worth stressing over?
I am happy and healthy.
Put yourself in their shoes.
Why am I letting this affect me?
I am grateful for what I have.


I really try to squeeze exercise into my day. Lately I have been walking around the Torrens River, escaping the office for some fresh air and vitamin d, or I coax my partner or aunty to come for a walk with me after work. I also try to disguise  exercise, because the word alone makes me cringe and want to rebel by sitting on my bum in protest, by going for walks down the beach, or performing water aerobics like a goober!!!


I give myself permission to stuff up, be grumpy and tired, and to say no - something that I struggled with before depression with my perfectionist/stress head personality.

I make the time to do tasks that I find fulfilling, like renovating, writing, kicking back in my deckchair in the backyard and reading, and running baths with overflowing bubbles.

I know my limits, such as staying home 3 nights during the work week, and I stick to them.

I have learnt to validate and trust my opinion, which has helped me to find my voice. I used to find myself biting my tongue a lot in fear of upsetting someone or having my opinion discarded. Now, while I am still mindful of others feelings, I trust my judgement; it's like a weight has been shifted from my shoulders and I feel much more confident in my abilities.

I have learnt compassion, understanding and respect for fellow mental health sufferers and supporters of those suffering.

I have learnt the true value of health and happiness.

I have fallen in love with my friends, family and partner all over again, and I will be forever grateful for their support and patience.

Overall I believe that I have become a better, stronger, happier and healthier person because of my experience.

Me all dressed up for the races!

Have you ever suffered from a mental health issue? What have you learnt? What have you learnt from supporting someone with mental health? What have you learnt from my blog?

Look after yourself and those around you,

Kirsty xxxx

Thursday, 15 November 2012

An Australian Soldier...

The cutest couple EVER! Brock and Amy - love these kids!

He hears the sound of his alarm beeping far before he sees the light illuminating the room.

Surely not, he thinks, as he rolls over and tenderly places a kiss on his gorgeous girlfriends shoulder.

She, of course, is wide awake and has been all night but she lays still slowly inhaling and exhaling as if to give the illusion that she’s asleep while she enjoys the tender touch of his lips.

Today’s the day she thinks.

He presses his body against hers, pulling her in close, breathing in the scent of her hair, that beautiful smell of sweet apples that tickles his nostrils and reminds him of her whenever he smells it.

He then slowly peels his body from hers and swings his legs over the bed. His right ankle brushes against something hard; it’s his boot that he’d left next to the bed last night.

He groggily tip toes into his built in wardrobe, so as to not stir his peaceful princess, shuts the door behind him, and flicks on the light.

He peels his carefully ironed shirt off of the coat hanger and slips in his left arm, shrugs his shoulders and brings around his right arm to cover it in cloth too.

He smiles as he realises that he has done this to perfection, without a single crease.

Next he unfolds his pants that were placed upon a thick wooden coat hanger, opens the mouth wide and slowly steps one foot inside, gains his balance and quickly steps the other beside it, then he draws them up to his waist, tightens the buttons, and tucks his shirt in.

He takes a deep breath. Today’s the day he thinks.

He flicks off the light and gently pushes on the door to re enter into the bedroom.

She rolls over to admire the view. He kisses her gently on the cheek.

He then opens the top drawer to his bedside table revelling his fluffy green socks. He unwraps them from the cute little bun that she ties them up in and quickly pulls them over his toes.

He then slips his feet into his perfectly polished shoes and does up the laces.

She wriggles over to the side of the bed and wraps her arms around him; she feels so comforted.

He lets her stay like this for a little while and feels the energy rush between them, but he knows that he must continue to get ready otherwise he will be late, and of all days, he must not be late today.

He regretfully unfolds her hands and walks into the bathroom where he splashes some water into his face and takes a good hard look at himself in the mirror.

He sees a young boy playing army men with the plastic figurines that “father Christmas” had given him in a stocking one year.

And within a blink of an eye, he sees a grown man, dressed in uniform, ready for another days work. Work; just another day in the “office”.

He makes sure that his collar is perfectly straightened, that his hair is slicked to the side, and that there’s no “fluff” on his uniform.

Today’s the day.

When he turns around, she’s staring at him in the doorway.

 He nuzzles his nose into her neck and then whispers in her ear, “now now, I’ll be back before you know it, and then we can start our life together”.

A tear runs down her cheek, not because she’s sad, but because she’s bursting with pride.

Today’s the day he leaves for Afghanistan for 6 months to serve his country.

Today’s the day he makes his girlfriend, friends, family and nation proud.

This kid never fails to crack me up - out of uniform he's just a typical Aussie bloke!

To Brock, one of my best mates, see you on the flip side and thanks – thanks for being a great friend and for choosing to protect your country.

I am so proud.

I'll look after your princess until you return mwaaa aaaa ahhh!!!

Look after yourself and those around you,