Unspoken Conversations are the topics that are often swept under the carpet, whispered amongst the closest of friends and bitched about by many. I want to create awareness about difficult things that people face in life; grief, mental health, money, illnesses, family troubles, relationship difficulties and putting yourself first. I want to tell the truth about things that really matter.

Monday, 12 November 2012

Too Much Pressure?


What is one of the first things that we ask people when we first meet them?

Yup, what do you do for a living?

If I said a doctor, what images, stereotypes and assumptions would you make about my life and the person that I am?

How about if I told you that I cleaned skid marks off of a toilet bowl?

I struggle with how much emphasis and pressure is placed on your career. I also struggle with how people think that in order to be successful, you must climb the corporate ladder and be rolling in it.


As many of you know, my partner and I are moving back to where we were bought up soon.

Guess what the 2 most common questions are?

What are you going to do for a job? And why would you want to give up a permanent position in a great job to move back to the country?

Yup, career related.

The answer? Because there's more to life then climbing the corporate ladder and rolling in dosh for me.

I soon realised that bigger pay cheques usually come with more responsibility and more responsibility means more stress. And for me, a natural stress head and perfectionist, using my energy on work related stress is simply not worth the additional moolah.


So I decided that I would prefer to get paid less, in order to have more energy left for my partner, family and happiness.

Of course, a slower pace of life, fresh air, rainwater and deserted beaches were definitely up there with swaying my decision.

Does that make me unsuccessful in society's eyes?

It then really made me think about other peoples situations and how they view their "career". 

Is a toilet cleaner any happier than a doctor?

If a girls life ambition is to raise a family - how would society react? I mean, isn't it one of the toughest jobs out there? What other job is 24/7?

No wonder at 17 or 18 when we're asked to make decisions about our career we're often scared into inaction, delaying big choices with gap years and moving out of home until we're older.

I am often left wondering whether there is more to life then full time work? Will I ever not be exhausted?

I guess I now realise why people quit their jobs and go traveling, or leave permanent jobs to go part time, or leave jobs to volunteer - because they get to a point where no amount of money that they earn will make them genuinely happy, and they end up finding fulfilment and happiness elsewhere.

I remember that one of the teachers at school had a poster that said that on average, we have 7 career changes in our life.

Is that because people are searching for fulfillment?

When do we start weighing up happiness versus money? To me, you can not place a sum on your happiness.

Do you struggle with these things or am I the only one?

Look after yourself and those around you,

Kirsty xxxx


Emma Peds said...

It's true, 'so what do you do' is often the conversation starter, but while some people use it to 'rate' a person on their 'friendability' (or perhaps usability), others use it as just that - a conversation opener. I know that I've met a lot of people who do a lot of interesting and different jobs and when you've been in the same career for many years, it's interesting to see what other people get up to, and what their job entails! Fishermen, cleaners, plumbers, electricians or PR executives. Often I've found that those who have found a job that they enjoy doing are happier than those who get paid the big bucks! I know I chose to work where I grew up because I love the place and even though I've lived all over the world, this is my home country/land and I feel a yearning for it when I'm not here. I also remember one of my mates at school saying that when she grew up she wanted to be a Mum - and that never really changed for her - sure she did other jobs along the way, but she was just keen to be a mother and look after her children - and she's a great Mum! So it's about following your dream, finding something you like doing and smiling, because so many people hate their jobs and you're at work more than you're not these days!!

Kirsty Arnold said...

I love love love this Emma. Your mum happened to be the teacher who had the sign on her desk :) The country has always been "home home" to me :) I'm glad you've found a job that you are passionate about :) Isn't it crazy that we spend more time with our work mates than anyone else! xoxox

Samara said...

Totally agree with this post- there is far too much pressure on people to have a career. Since when did your value in life become all about the way you chose to earn money? I think there is a lot to be said for the things that you do outside of work. Something I am definitely starting to think through :)

lib said...

I totally agree - which may sound a bit weird coming from me when I place a lot of emphasis on what I do as a career as I am trying to follow my passion. That's because I get a lot of satisfaction from what I do and I'm just lucky that I get paid for it! I have no ambition to work my way up into "higher" positions though, as I'm the same as you and a massive stresshead - so not worth it!

I hope that one day there won't be so much emphasis placed on career. There are so many other worthwhile things to do with your life - like writing this blog! (Keep up the good work :) )