Unspoken Conversations are the topics that are often swept under the carpet, whispered amongst the closest of friends and bitched about by many. I want to create awareness about difficult things that people face in life; grief, mental health, money, illnesses, family troubles, relationship difficulties and putting yourself first. I want to tell the truth about things that really matter.

Wednesday 4 June 2014

Hitting the Big O

Oh no is she really going to go there? 

There,  like down there,  there.

Yup,  she is.

It has been bought to my attention that some women have never,  ever,  ever climaxed during sexual experimentation,  so listen up ladies and gents,  there's some things you need to know about reaching the magic o.

First up ladies, if you're not sure whether you've had one or not then you haven't.  Definitely haven't.  You will know.  Trust me.

Next to my dear, fellow,  lovely over thinking,  mind wandering,  easily distracted ladies; why do we love chocolate?

Because it's naughty?  Because with every bite we savor the taste and slowly melt the sweet goodness on our taste buds as it feels our mouth with innocent temptation.  We think about the chocolate.  We know we love the chocolate. The chocolate hits the spot first time every time. .. The chocolate doesn't disappoint (whoops there it is! )

But would the chocolate taste soooo good if you started thinking about how much it cost or the energy it required to go down the street, line up behind 10 other people with a basket full of shopping and then,  when you finally got home,  you didn't really need it or it didn't really taste as good as you'd hoped and you were left feeling fat and frumpy?

Would the sweetness,  the naughtiness and the chocolate really hit the spot if you allowed these thoughts to enter your mind?

No.

My point?  You've got to be in the moment with your partner. The poor guy is probably doing everything in his power to make it feel good for you and meanwhile your mind is off trying to grab a glimpse of the TV or thinking about your to do list so much so that you blurt out are you done yet?

Allow your mind to indulge in those naughty little thoughts.  Lay your eyes on the way your partners arm muscles tense,  and how cute his bum looks.  Fill your mind with how good it feels.  Don't be afraid to take control or to carefully instruct him where to touch. Let's face it,  he's going to get off no matter what so use those thoughts and that ever talking voice to your advantage.

Boys.

Our boobs are attached to our body.

Sometimes your partner will like them touched and sometimes if you touch them then she's likely to slap you.

Gauge her mood.  Listen to what she wants.

Put in a little effort. 

Girls don't spring to attention and instantly want to jack rabbit til the cows come home like you so easily do.

Show them that you want to please them. Take the attention away from your desires and focus on theirs.

Girls love the kissy wissy,  touchy wutchy,  compliments on their body (big ticket winner as most girls aren't happy with something or another), type foreplay.

Just do it.

Don't moan and groan about how they've got it easy and can get it whenever they want it.

This will lead to a cold shoulder,  tuck and roll with the quilt, no talking, no big o scenario.

Tread carefully with dirty talk. .. it'll either be a big winner winner chicken dinner with your Mrs or she'll be drier then the sahara during a drought the second the words leave your lips.

Did I mention foreplay?  Oh and making it about her satisfaction? Haha 2 big important things that can take you from hero to zero or zero to hero!

Have control.  Con-trol.  Geez think about the cricket for all she cares,  just try and last the distance. Just like hearing the final siren blast and you're still standing,  uninjured and a winner,  you'll feel proud for going the distance all the way to o town. .. so pace yourself.

So ladies and gents,  there you have it.

Of course,  the first time after reading this you might not hit the spot because you're too busy thinking about my super helpful tips lol but over time,  and with practice,  you'll find your groove and you'll know just why the big o is worth the persistence.

Happy practicing.

Look after yourself and those around you,

Kirsty xxx

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